The Order of the Moo

* Emilee's face tells it all. Yummy, Order of the Moo. Bret is our party animal. He figured out some airplane tickets for us to Lagona. Oh I am excited!
* What a great Sunday we had today. Tom is the best Primary Teacher, the kids love him.
* Had a good talk with Kelly. She was sitting at the pool, watching the kids swim.
* The Shepherds came down tonight with chocolate cake. We had fun talking.
* The air is filled with smoke tonight, with ashes dropping out of the sky. The fires are burning everywhere.
* I am reading Feelings Buried Alive Never Die. It is making me think differently. "Whatever we choose to focus our attention on will automatically multiply in our lives."

Kelly is Pregnant!

*Kelly is Pregnant, Wonderful, Wonderful! Another dear Thompson coming to town. Kelly is so sick, I must think of her 100 times a day. Wish she would let me come out and help her. I would like to fan her sheets when she is hot and warm them with the hair drier when she is chilling. I always remember my Mom's cool hand on my forehead when I threw up. I will be glad when she get to her doctor's appointment. She is the best Baby Mom! I am praying for her.

* Had the funnest day with Kim on Friday. It was my Birthday and we had our toenails done for the 4th of July, a yummy salad, and a long over due talk. I love Kim. I love her family and her life.

* Talked to Matt tonight on the phone. He told me about a prayer circle they will have tomorrow night for him. This is truly a miracle. Tomorrow will be grand, just thinking about him.

* We are trying to get 7 horses ready to take to a sale in Monticello. Hope those wild things can calm down.

* I am struggling sleeping. Tom moves all over the bed all night.  His shoulders hurt. I rub them, but then I  can't get back to sleep. Some times I slip into Margie's room to read for awhile. Think that is where I am heading.

*I so don't want to be a worrier. That has become my current goal.

* " Live only in the moment." Breath

Blossoms in the Desert

* Tonight I have six little bodies sleeping in my house. So much life and excitement that now I can't sleep. I love them so.

* Hiked to Ensign Peak with Trudy on Friday. The ride to Salt Lake was wide. But the view was inspiring. I always learn so much from Trudy. Brigham Young took the 12 to this peak where they had the temple ordinances. It was beautiful.

* Trying to get Tom to eat good for his dang kidneys. Not an easy job!

*Attended our first Support Group in Buffdale. Tom refused to talk, or write, smile, but he was there. Matt called the next day to find out how it went. His comment was,"Come on Dad you got to chime in your shit. We got to get through this together." loved it

Sweet Margie

* This is Christmas Eve at Kimmie's House.

Mom is sporting her traditional Red Christmas Jacket. I love her.

*Little did she know what the next few months would bring her. A trip to Arizona, a move to Jamestown, cleaning out her house, a heart attack, and trying to hang on to life and her memory. As she came out of surgery she was as white as death felt like we were looking into her casket.

But she rallied and smiled and laughed again.

*I brought her home to Wallsburg. She was so confused and lost. I slept most nights with her because she would get up in the night and walk around.  One night I came into her room and she said to me."There is someone else living in this room. Look she likes the same things I do. She likes this beautiful gray basket. (But Mom you gave me that basket years ago). She likes the statue of a little girl on the beach holding up a seashell to her ear. (but Mom you gave me that little girl for Christmas years ago). She likes wooden shoes and she left some on the counter by the sink. (But Mom I left those there because I know you are Dutch and you love wooden shoes). Now look at this, as Mom opens the bathroom drawer, she even like the kind of toothpaste I like. (But Mom this is you).  We then crawled in bed and I began to explain to her about her life. Where she had lived and all about her family. She kept saying, " Oh thank you for helping me remember, don't stop tell me more." I love this mother of mine. I wonder what things she will have to endure?

I wonder the lessons that I need to learn.

"Now I can really understand what it means to say that the house

 where my mother has been is forever blessed."      Out of Africa

A New Day

* These trees remind me of Africa. They are so powerful and mighty. Something I haven't felt for a long time... powerful. For the last two months I have lost myself. I have felt so tired that part of me died. I wasn't doing the things that feed my heart, like walking, studying and praying. I must remember this lesson. Take care of yourself first and then face life.
* I woke at 5:45 and watched the sun come up. So calming.
*I walked with Linda and shared similar experiences abouot our Moms, who are both struggling. She showed me the Brigham City Temple paintings. They have warm tender figures that Michael Maughn has painted. One taken at our pond. I loved them! She asked me to come help install them. Oh does that sound delicious. Maybe Archie will be there. He so loved Brigham. I will keep my finger crossed for that lucky happening.
* We get to see Matt tonight. He looked so amazing last week.
* "Forgiveness is giving up on the prospect of a better past."

3:00 in the morning

* It is 3:00 in the morning and Mom is up going through the closet. I am  thankful today for an electric blanket for her, thermal underwear, a hair dryer, and a heater that  is cranked up to smoldering. Her heart is only pumping about 40% so she is always needing warming.
*I' m so grateful for a an amazingly peaceful, fun dividing up of Mom and Dad's furniture. All four children were there and we chose items because of favorite memories.
* I scored a roll top desk for Tom's bills, a fridge for the garage, Mom's silver, the piano, a black trunk for the back porch, and more things my brain can't pull up at the moment.
* Tom is mellowing. He watched Mom all day today while we worked. He fixed her lunch (peanut butter and honey sandwiches with a coke) and was sitting in her room explaining all her questions away when I got home at 10:00. Mom asked a jillion questions over and over.
* We had a beautiful palomino colt. "Legend" this morning. Diane and Paul rode on the 4 wheeler with us through the field with the 4 new horses. The sun shone bright. We were grateful to be together.
* "covering" symbolizes the atonement   

Watch Out!

If I ever think I am a little too smart for my pants.... watch out! Thursday morning I headed to the temple in  my new skirt with my new sandals thinking life was mighty fine. In the Harmon's parking lot I proceeded to walk out of my skirt and slip thinking something must be wrong with these new shoes..... dang, everything in a big knot around my shoes. An older man tried not to laugh out loud and I didn't dare look any farther. Kim fixed me up with a new skirt and safety pins. Friday, Mom had a heart attack and it has been down hill ever since. She has been so sick. She wakes in the night so confused and lost. Last night she thought there was a stranger living in her room. We talked for a long time. She couldn't remember where she lived. So I described her condo and Jamestown. She kept saying, "O thank you for helping me remember." She asked " Where do they send you at Jamestown if you can't keep up?" It broke my heart. I wonder if she has been going to all her activities because she thinks if she can't keep up with all of them they will put her in the Alshiemers Ward. She is so innocent, just like a toddler. She is constantly cold. We have the heat cranked up and the electric blanket on high, thermals and big pink socks, and I warm her with the hair dryer too. I just checked her and she was going through the drawers looking for her key....she didn't want to be locked out of her room. "Mom you are home and you don't need a key." oh my heart, "Archie where are you?" We flew down the canyon this morning to meet Matt and hand him his suit case full of supplies for the next two months. Oh my prayers have been answered. I hope. He had Dad spent a teary conversation on Monday night. Some pretty heavy promises were made. I love how our family all came together in prayer and fasting and phone calls. Such dear children, I am blessed. Matt says to tell everyone he loves them. Tonight I am tired and very humbled. No fancy pants for me! I like this dirty sweat shirt and watering boots I have on right now. I like helping Dad change the water and putting Grandma to bed. Thank you Lord for simple blessing!

Blessings

*This morning I feel a wave of blessings in my life
*For one thing I have a computer again that I can follow the kids blogs
* Everything is coming alive in Wallsburg. I can't wait to work in the dirt today.
* Margie and I went on a ride yesterday. We went to the cemetery and visited Phinie and Bill. Mom did her usual cleaning off any dead grass and she talked to them. I can't wait to get to know them both better. I remember Grandpa from giving him baths with Mom when he had cancer and was dieing. I was only four.
*She went to my favorite little quiet boutique and I got a flower basket. It sings of spring.
* Tom and I ate the best shrimp salad last night. I love that man!
* Today I am taking Sam to the groomer. Hope she doesn't put that silly scarf on him. He gets so embarrassed.
* I feel so filled with the joy of life today, I am more than grateful!
*"When you hear His words echoing in your own voice,"forgive them for they know not what they do." then you will begin to see the Master in the mirror. His image will appear to you there first. Your countenance will look more like His: more humble, more contrite, more obedient and filled with more light than you are right now." Snuffer

The Boys

*This morning I miss these three little boys! They love to wrestle and pile on each other. The tramp is perfect for them to jump and laugh and rough house. One of my very favorite nights was the first night they had their tramp and we laid in blankets watching for satellites. Jace just had a Birthday, already 6 almost 16. I love him and his brothers!
* I made a fun skirt last night
* Talked to Maralee on the phone for a long time. It felt nice. Mike Statton is so darn sick.
* I am going to a Birthday party for Mom at Jamestown today and dinner tonight.
*Washed Mom's feet and gave her a pedicure
*"Choice of Faith is an everyday decision"

Walllsburg

* I am thankful this spring morning to be in Wallsburg
* Walked with Sam and drank in all the new fresh green
* Last Thursday on the way to the temple I stopped and checked on Mom. She was in a "bell" class. She looked so cute with her white hair. I felt like I was watching my own kindergartener at her first program. She was so innocent, watching for her letter to come up on the board so she would ring her bell at just the right time. I love her.
* Matt called last night, he sounded good
* " And this is the gospel, the glad tidings. . . " D & C  76:40